Seaivew Stories Newsletter -10


September visitors to Sept. 11, 2010:

Did You Know?
After the showing of the series pilot, the network executives gave it a standing ovation, something unheard of for a TV pilot.


"I know the Academy's said to train us to eat, study, and sleep at attention but I never thought Admiral Starke would force us to take it literally!"

Unscheduled Dive


Word is that it was a story conference in Irwin Allen’s office and the writer Harlan Ellison, one of the ABC censors, Irwin,  and other network executives were discussing his telplay ‘The Price of Doom’ and the need for changes.Arguments and bickering began in earnest on all sides.


The final straw was when the censor's increasingly belittlling comments was augmented with a biting "Writers are toadies. You'll do what you're told."


Harlan, outraged, is said to have jumped up on the table, run down it,apprently to do the man harm, but slipped and either hit him in the face or landed on him.

In either case,  the executive fell out of his chair, knocking the model of Seaview off the wall which landed on  top of him, breaking his pelvis.


You might call it an uncheduled dive.


Irwin is said to have settled things out of court.

Other Barbs and Arrows:
The real life crew of the US Navy submarine SSN Jack complained that there was a definite lack of discipline aboard Seaview. Of course;since we've all seen men in the crew's mess repeatedly ignoring the call to Battle Stations due to stock footage, it seems they had a point!
Kid's Stuff
Parent's Magazine didn't consider Voyage a children's show and complained it 'stirred up political hatred.'
The NABB (National Association of Better Broadcasts was a bit more negative, saying it was a 'nightmarish show, and not for children.'
Danger, Danger!
When first aired in England, 'The Price of Doom' had warning that this episode was 'Not for people with a nervous disposition.'


"And if you order two kits, you get a free bonus 'get out of trouble' card!"


"I don't care if you're the Captain, you're going to  stand in that corner until you remember your lines!"

Caption Contest Winner!


"Now, if I can just get to the mess hall and grab that Coconut Cream pie before Chip gets there..."

Don't forget! A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words Contest 2has begun!

Get ready, get set, start those keyboards!

New Caption Contest




From: Katie, NIMR Marketing

To: Adm. H. Nelson

Re: Recruitment


As regards our current staffing problem, the number of applicants to man Seaview are below minimum. If we don’t see an increase soon,  we will have no choice but to limit our contracts, not to mention shore leave, which would make for a very grumpy Captain unable to play James Bond with ONI as often as he'd like.


From: H. Nelson

To: Katie, NIMR Marketing

Re: Recruitment


Just goes to show you that there’s a silver lining in every cloud! J


From: Katie, NIMR Marketing

To: Adm. H. Nelson

Re: Recruitment


Very funny, Sir.  However, we believe the lack of applicants is due to the following losses to date:


3 Diving Bells*

4 Mini-subs*

6 Flying Subs*

1 high tensile plastic view port (do you have any idea of the cost of replacing these things?)

1 Sea Scooter (docked from Captain Crane’s pay-still waiting on that official  report, sir.(Way overdue)

Wetsuits and diving gear (too many to count)-eaten, melted, moldy, mildewed, and generally the worse for wear- Please advise the Captain that Neoprene is not compatible with hydrochloric acid (see: Stomach, Wale)

1 Antennae Array

7 Sonar units

8 Radar units

4 dozen chocolate chip cookies

2 Radio units

1 Amrac Computer

5 Diving Planes

2 Inertial Guidance Systems

577 Circuitry Room panels

3 Anti radiation force field units

7 gross LED lights

2 gross Twinkies

2 crates Flea Dip (Sir, I know subs are called Pig Boats, but that’s ridiculous!)


Loss of Manpower to death, dismemberment, accident, aliens, monsters, digested, dissolved, drowned, imploded, exploded, etc:


103 crewmen (SSRN Seaview)*

25 cewmen (SSRN Polidor)*


(The numbers aren’t in  on the loss of passengers yet (including contracted scientists, highjackers, stowaways, etc.)


Loss of Manpower- quit, fired, arrested, requested to resign and/or return to civilian life or the Navy, etc:


Number Classified



You can see, sir, that these facts alone might scare otherwise interested applicants away. They might as well sign on for hazardous duty in the Navy.



From: H. Nelson

To: Katie, NIMR Marketing

Re: Recruitment


Well, if they can’t take the heat, perhaps it’s best they don’t apply. Call in the Marines to fill in for our present and future gap of manpower. They won’t complain.



From: Katie, NIMR Marketing

To: Adm. H. Nelson

Re: Recruitment


They have more sense than that. You have got to figure out some other way to lure other idiots, er, I mean men, to augment Seaview’s crew!



From: H. Nelson

To: Katie, NIMR Marketing

Re: Recruitment


How about allowing female crewmembers? Might make things a bit more crowded and we’ll need to install special air purification units to clear out the hairspray but I hear the Navy’s thinking about it, and the men sure wouldn’t mind. In fact…we could advertise our great maternity program.


From: Katie, NIMR Marketing

To: Adm. H. Nelson

Re: Recruitment


You can’t be serious! It doesn’t pay enough anyway. I have an idea, though. Why not ask those fanfiction folks to write us a solution to the problem; perhaps a contest.


From: H. Nelson

To: Katie, NIMR Marketing

Re: Recruitment


Good idea! The prize can be a date with the Captain and/or other available bachelors; it’ll keep him out of trouble awhile. I could use them  to help pump out the bilge tanks. Add me to the list of eligibles. Get things organized. Contact er, who is it again? Agent Catfish? Yes that’s it. Contact her and get things moving. I can hardly wait. I’ve been standing in this ballast tank for hours trying  to blow the water out of  the damn thing so we can surface, but all I can manage is pretty bubbles. At least I can sing it better than Lee.


From: Katie, NIMR Marketing

To: Adm. H. Nelson

Re: Recordings R Us


Dear sirs,

What is the current royalty rate for ‘I’m forever blowing Bubbles’ and/or  ‘Pretty Bubbles’ (I’m not sure if they’re one in the same).

I think we may owe you, big time.


*Believed to be actual tally